Tag Archives: depression

Through the Blackness.

 

Through the Darkness – a poem by Marissa Campbell


I am hollow: bereft.

I feel the blackness coalesce.

Where am I?

Who am I?

This is not where I’m meant to be.

This isn’t the path chosen for me.

It’s all wrong.

I’m all wrong.

I can’t find my way out.

I can’t climb, I don’t shout.

Why bother.

I’m so tired.

Why does this circle entwine?

Why does this box confine?

My heart aches.

My head aches.

Round and round, I blindly flail.

My urgency is to succeed, yet my pattern is fail.

I can’t do this anymore.

I can’t be this anymore.

Yet I can’t just make it go away.

I must face this bleakness; I choose to stay.

Give me strength.

Give me peace.

Give me hope.

Let me be.

 

This was written in 2006.

In gratitude,

Marissa

 

How do I deal with these feelings?

Feelings by Marissa Campbell
How do I deal with these feelings?

This is an excerpt from one of my personal journals …

“How do I deal with these feelings of deep resentment, unhappiness, anger and oppression?

Such heavy words.

I have them, but what I am supposed to do with them?

Perhaps yelling and screaming? Perhaps crying? Perhaps taking action?

But what action would that be?

In order to get myself out of this situation, I must make changes, or movements toward alternatives. But what are those changes? those movements?

I’m not sure of the answers, or am I? I am questioning my clarity, my understanding, my intuition, my gut.

I need to release or express these difficult emotions. But how?

I must accept that everything is only temporary, nothing is stagnant, only my thinking, my inability to act, no my unwillingness to act stops me from moving forward, to moving to where I want to be.

I act by letting go, by facing the emotions, by feeling them, by releasing them from my mind, my body, my soul.”

I wrote this many years ago, and it was these types of ruminations that lead to the awareness and answers that are in my book Life: Living in Fulfillment Every Day. It was a long journey to find the insight and courage to act. I hope you find your way too.

In gratitude,

Marissa